Jubilee Dee, Jubilee Do, Jubilee Don’t

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So the old dear has been sitting on her wicked posh chair for 60 years. By old dear I mean the wonderful Elizabeth Regina II. I reckon we would get on like a house on fire, so I am now going to refer to her as Maj.Here is what I imagine would be on her dos and don’ts list she has passed to Prince Harry and Pippa for her 4-day weekend bonanza.

Do

  • Make outrageous comments – if you can channel your inner Prince Phillip do so.
  • Wear RWB – It’s time to be patriotic and proud. Find you best Reds, Whites and Blues and rock on.
  • Drink Gin – Everyone know Gin is Maj’s preferred tipple just reference her twitter page @Queen_UK
  • Party Hard – The government is currently telling people to work harder, well I’m telling you to party harder. Maj and I expect all to be enjoying the festivities; DIY is for normal bank holiday weekends.

    Don’t

    • Wear Masks – Maj and I think all these masks of famous people are soooooooooooo last year, she let you rock them at the wedding but two years on the trot is a big no-no.
    • Get fruity with the Pimms – You know when you have finished your glass and all the fruit is at the bottom. You tip the glass up and your head back to try and get the fruit to fall. This is not a good look, don’t do it.
    • Wear a football shirt – England are rubbish, it’s not cool. Maj much prefers rugby and cricket.
    • Leave the country – going abroad for the weekend is for chumps and after discussing it with Maj, we won’t let you back in.
    • Get sunburnt – Wear sunscreen kids
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